Yours jokes

Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.

My eggcellent egg yolks crack everyone up.

If you don't like them, you're just hard boiled.

Your mom is so fat that she works as a hydraulic press in a car factory!

You’re so ugly, I can see why your dad left now.

Roses are red, violets are blue, feminist pussy stinks, and yours does too.

If you're bored, punch an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Your race's favorite Star Wars Characters:

Arab...Admiral Ackbar (Allahu Akbar)

East Asian...Qui-Gon Jinn (Ching-Chong-Wing-Wong)

Jew...Rey (Ray)

Black...BB-8 (BBC)

Italian...Jabba the Hutt (Pizza Hut)

German...Admiral Piett (Hitler)

You're so poor, even the store didn't let you buy anything free.

Your mum is gay; her name is Rachel.

I have double standards: burn a body at a crematorium and you're being a respectful friend; do it at home and you're destroying evidence.

"I'd rather go through the pain of childbirth again than let you drill in my mouth," the woman told her dentist.

He replied, "Well, please make up your mind so I can adjust my chair."

Your hairline is so far back that Green Lantern became Blue Torch.

Are you a fire alarm because you're loud and annoying?

You know the phrase "one man's trash is another man's treasure"?

Great phrase, bad way to find out you're adopted!

Your hairline goes sooooo far back that dinosaurs exist on it.

Was your dad a pilot? Because I rate you a 9/11.

When your brother sends you to go get a box of condoms for his b-day. (* *)

If they made a movie about your sex life, what would it be?

In Afghanistan, it would be "Twelve Years a Slave!" 🤣

Q. What's red and crawls up your leg?

A. A homesick abortion.

I saw a kid crying yesterday, and I asked him, "Where are your parents?" Then he started crying harder.