Yours jokes
Your mama so fat, she caused a traffic jam just by crossing the street.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To slide into your mom's bed.
Your mama is so fat, she needs two phones to take a picture of herself.
Orphan: Can I come over?
Girl: Yeah, but you have to bring your parents.
You're so ugly that they faked a whole pandemic just so you can put on a mask to cover that ugly-ass face.
(Best pick-up line ever). Your body is like 9/11. I wanna crash into your twin towers. 😏
I thought you played football 'cause you're hairline is receiving.
I knew you played football because your hairline is receding.
Your hairline got pulled back. You look like you've been climbing Chris, and you got smacked up by Will Smith.
The earth was once flat... until they buried your mom.
Q: How do emo kids complement each other?
A: I like your cuts g.
Your mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale the doctor asked for her weight, not her phone number.
Sonic says if you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If a physically handicapped gay white male is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall, and if you are a gay white male that is well-endowed that is not physically handicapped, and if you want the physically handicapped gay white male who is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall to suck your dick, what do you do to convince him to suck your dick if you have a hard on and your horny as hell?
Put $25.00 under the handicapped stall before you put your dick under the handicapped stall.
A woman is on the edge of a bridge, about to commit suicide, when a strange man comes up to her.
"Tell me, why do you wish to end your life?" he asks in a booming but gentle voice.
"My children died last year in a car crash, I'm battling depression, my husband left me, and I lost my job," she sobs. "I don't wish to live anymore."
The man mulls this over, and proclaims, "I will solve all your problems, as I am a wizard and possess unfathomable abilities. However, you must grant me a blowjob first."
The delighted woman readily agrees, takes him below the bridge, and fulfills his request. After they're done, he asks, "How old are you?"
"37," she replies, wiping her mouth.
"You're 37 and you still believe in wizards?"
A beautiful woman is on the ledge of a bridge about to commit suicide.
A homeless man walks by her and says, "What are you doing?"
She says, "I'm going to jump!"
The homeless man says, "If you're going to kill yourself, do you wanna have sex with me first?"
The woman replies, "No way, creep! Never that!"
The homeless man doesn't seem bothered and says, "That's fine, I'll just wait 'til you're at the bottom."
If I wanted to commit suicide, I would climb up to your ego, and then jump down to your IQ.
Why don’t you act like your hairline and kindly take several steps back?
Why are there so many scars and cuts on your arm?
Because it's a battlefield.
Your hairline and your eyebrows are like your parents, separated.