You're jokes

Your hairline is so long that Odell Beckham Jr. missed a catch and saw your hairline from a mile away!

Dad: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Dad: Because you’re going to need them there.

Your mom is so stupid, she got lost in Bed Bath & Beyond and slept on the floor.

Friend: You're adopted.

Orphan: At least I was chosen!

Friend: At least I was kept.

"You look like Barney, I'm choking you too, and your face is turning all purple and blue!"

Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.

If you're here for a cheap laugh about suicide, I'll give you some real killer jokes!

I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.

Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.

Moto Moto, stop giving the baby your d*ck!

Your hairline is so [bad] Will Smith can't slap it back in place.

If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

You should always wash your sex toys. That's why priests baptize babies.

I asked, "Mom, what's that in the sky?"

Mom replied with, "That's your father."

I saw a little girl crying, and I said, "Where are your parents?" That day, I got fired from the orphanage. 🤪

Your mom's a whore, and so are you!

If you drop something, make your short friend get it.

Guy: Hi, how was your day today?

Woman: Good!

Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant*

Guy: How many months pregnant are you?

Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also, I’m not pregnant.

You're so fat that I run around you for exercise.

When they walk in and you're fucking... everyone at the morgue.

Hello, everyone, how is your day today?