You jokes
If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."
What's the difference between a trampoline and a child?
You take your shoes off before jumping on the trampoline.
What do you call 6 gay men having a fight?
Rainbow Six Siege
Son: Dad, I'm gay.
Dad: I support you.
Son: I like you.
Dad: Get out and into my room!
You just shot an unarmed man.
Well, he should have armed himself then.
Hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.
Did you hear about the man who died of a Viagra overdose?
They couldn't close the casket.
Do you know the phrase, "One man's trash is another man's treasure?" Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted.
Do you know what a reverse exorcism is?
It's when the devil tells the priest to get out of the child.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Don’t worry, he woke up.
In my basement.
A man walks into an enchanted forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.
“You can’t cut me down,” the tree exclaims, “I’m a talking tree!” The man responds, “You may be a talking tree, but you will have dialogue.”
Do you know why dead baby jokes are always funny?
They never get old.
What do you call a black man in the dark?
- Nothing.
What do you call a cow that skydives without a parachute?
Ground beef.
I have 206 bones. When I look at you, I have 207.
Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.
(insert funny joke about a dick here).
Did you laugh? Be honest.
Luisa: The ship doesn't swerve, as it heard how big the iceberg is.
Captain of the Titanic: Wait, what did you say?
3 minutes later:
Why didn't I listen to the strong one?
What’s the difference between a normal kid and an Emo?
When you feel an Emo's arm, there’s lots of texture! Feels great, too!