You jokes

With the sentence "Die in Hölle," you can buy shoes in Germany.

Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?

It had excellent mussel memory.

Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!

So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.

Q. What's the difference between a CEO and a deer?

A. You don't normally fuck the deer after you've shot it.

What did the tie say to the hat?

You go on ahead, I'll just hang around.

What did Google Translate say to Siri?

"Why are you so Siri-ous?"

Have you heard my cherry joke? It's pitiful.

Have you heard about the canoe sale down the road? It was an ordeal.

How do you annoy Pinocchio?

Ask him, "Do you always tell lies?"

A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before, what can I get you?" "Pop," goes the weasel.

Do you know where time is? Because it keeps flying by.

A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. When the neutron gets his drink, he asks, "Bartender, how much do I owe you?"

The bartender replies, "For you, neutron, no charge."

I've tried to like all of your jokes. They are funny 😆 and joshisboss, you are awesome. Keep up the good work 👍!

Me: Hey friend!

Friend: Yes?

Me: What is the missing sense? Seeing, smelling, _, tasting, hearing.

Friend: Touch.

Me: What do you spawn on Minecraft always? (jk only 99.99%)

Friend: Grass.

Me: And you get?

Friend: Touch grass.

What is the worst joke ever? It's you.

What do you call an orphan that grows to be a priest?

Fatherless.

What do you call a blank piece of paper?

Women's rights.

Why You should never poop on the floor in an Apple Store?

Because they don't have Windows. 🤢 🤣

I drove through a school zone and found out you can drag a speed bump 😬.

Do you work at Subway? Because you turn my 6 inch into a footlong.