You jokes
What do you call a rare fart in Egypt? A toot uncommon!
What do you call a dolphin in the woods? Dead.
What do you call a wheelchair user in a fire?
Hot Wheels.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
Boy: The principal is so dumb!
Girl: Do you know who I am?
Boy: No...
Girl: I am the principal's daughter!
Boy: Do you know who I am?
Girl: No...
Boy: Good! *Walks away*
If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber.
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.
Are you Jeffrey Dahmer? Because I'd love you to eat me.
What do you get when you put a baby in a blender?
A boner.
You can sink the Titanic like you can drive a bike. Not a joke.
Roses are red, violets are blue, you are so ugly that no one likes you.
How do you blindfold an Asian?
You use dental floss.
What’s the difference between a bank vault and you aunt's anus?
The owner of bank vaults don’t force you to penetrate it.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
You can hang the picture with one nail.
What do you call a Chinese baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals are hanging out eating lunch, which is a clown, you see, 'cause they're cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal, "Does this taste funny to you?"
Say what you want about Hitler, at least he got the trains to run on time.
I’d tell you a Chinese joke, but it’s wong.
What's life if you don't have one...
Don't make fun of the emo kid, or he's gonna bring his friends and you gotta fight the Suicide Squad.