You jokes
Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets it.
if you play minecraft: your dog is still waiting for you in the world you made along time ago.
What's the difference between you and a bench?
A bench can hold a family.
Millions of people are doing the exact same thing as you are right now.
Roses are red, violets are blue, she's only red bc she sucked you.
Shep
Bligitty blot, bliggity blit,
You better not be talkin' shit. 🔫
Do you want to know what gifts God gave me?
He didn't give me any.
I was made by the Devil.
How are you and an orphan similar?
Both of your fathers are invisible.
If ugliness was a brick, you would be the Great Wall of China.
Girlfriend: "Would you still love me if I was a figment of your imagination?"
My schizophrenic ass: Of course I would.
You are able to travel to the anime world, believe me, Michael Jackson did it.
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
You know it's so hard to clean my sex toys.
Thank you, Jesus, for creating holy water!
What do you call a person with a flip flop?
My dad.
Doctor: I’m sorry, I can’t see you today.
Orphan: Oh, how about tomorrow?
Doctor: No, I can’t ever see you.
Orphan: Why?
Doctor: Because I’m a family physician.
Rizz.
Are you a dinosaur? Because I want to blow you up.
My friend said an apple a day keeps the orphan away. I said only if you throw it hard enough.
Me: Hey, are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yeah, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.
What's the difference between a light bulb and a woman?
You can screw and unscrew a light bulb, but you can't unscrew a woman.
Genie: You cannot wish for more wishes, immortality, or love.
Man: I wish not to die a virgin.
Genie: I just said no wishing for immortality!