What do you call an alligator that can't get hard? A reptile dysfunction.
You Jokes
"What does the word 'gay' mean?" asked a son of his father.
"It means 'happy'," replied the father.
"Oh," contested the son, "so you are gay then?"
"No, son, I have a wife."
Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, "What kind of music do you like?" The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."
Are you a grave, 'cause I want you on me?
What do you call a piece of tech that acts emo?
Cutting-edge Technology.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know why I am still alive for you.
Welcome to Dave's Orphanage. "You make it, we take it."
Girls are like math; if they're under ten, then you use your fingers.
What do you call an all-you-can-eat buffet for a pedophile? A school bus.
To everyone saying, "Don't joke about suicide, it's not even funny to laugh about people dying." Do you think we have it easy? Have you ever thought these jokes were helping us to cope? Mind your own business and don't make assumptions on people you know nothing about, please and thanks.
"White people can't jump"...
"You must not have seen the twin towers on 9/11."
Teacher: Johnny, can you use a sentence with "definitely" in it?
Little Johnny: Do farts have lumps in them?
Teacher: Of course not, Johnny.
Little Johnny: Then Iβve definitely shat myself.
What do you call it when a midget waves at you?
A microwave.
When the Lego box says 6-99 years but you eat it in 20 minutes.
Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? You said you would never forget.
Father: "The church is on fire! GET OUT! GET OUT!"
Priest: "Ok, what about the children?"
Father: "FUCK THE CHILDREN!"
Priest: "Do you think we'll have time?"
What's the difference between a mosquito and a pornstar? One stops sucking when you smack it.
A lot of people claim that white privilege does not exist. Well, how the hell do you explain Michael Jackson not being charged for raping children, despite ample evidence?
What's the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman? You can unscrew the lightbulb.
What do you call an ice skating dwarf?
A midget spinner.
