You jokes
Why can't you do a Math test in the zoo?
Because there are too many Cheetahs!
Q: What do you call 9/11? A: Enemy persion airstrike.
You're so fat, you went on a scale and it said, "One at a time."
Your forehead is so big you have to wear a hoodie for the Rock to see your ego because your forehead is so big.
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A selfie.
Memes
What do you get when you cross a cow with a cat?
A: Cowacat
B: Mooore
C: Cowacatfood
Q: What do you call a zombie with no mouth?
A: Useless.
What's the difference between a human and a potato? There is none, you can eat both.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair on fire?
Hot Wheels.
"Do you have a noose?"
"Nose?"
"Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."
"I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"
"No."
*Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*
Did you hear that Rushdie has a new book? It's titled "Buddha, that Fat Fuck."
My friend: Hey, why are you always smiling?
Me: 'Cause life is a joke and we’re all slacking it off.
What do you call an IT teacher that touches his students?
A PDF file.
"What's the wifi password?"
"121i362"
"It's not working."
"What wifi are you trying to connect to?"
"The United Airline."
"We're in the World Trade Center, though."
How do you starve a hippie? You hide its welfare check under the soap.
Why are you sad? Because you are in Morocco, ha ha.
What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
Yo hairline so far, that if you put tables on it, it would NEVER end.
Why you should never borrow money from dwarves?
Because they are always short! 😁😁😁😁
What do you call seagulls that fly over the bay? Bagels.