You jokes
Why do orphans like tigers? I don't know, you tell me.
If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.
My enemy likes to act like he’s stupid sometimes, and so once he asked me what a sin was, and I responded with, “you.”
Did you hear that oxygen and magnesium hooked up last night?
OMg!
2 7 73 53.
I'll give you time, figure it out.
Memes
What do you call someone who’s afraid of breaststroke? Chicken breast.
Me: It's so sad Ironman died of ligma. You: What the heck is an Ironman? Me: Ligma balls. "snap" ^kaboom^
You're so fat, you went on a scale and it said, "One at a time."
Maybe if you get a better hairline, your dad will come back with the milk.
How do you kidnap Stephen Hawking?
Shut off his computer.
Your forehead is so big you have to wear a hoodie for the Rock to see your ego because your forehead is so big.
What dessert do you get on September 11th?
An ice cream flight!
Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A selfie.
Q: What do you call a dog that stepped in its own shit?
A: I don't know.
What do you call Panera bread when it’s on top of someone?
Panera head.
Yo mama so ugly, when she was cutting onions, the onions cried instead of her.
Yo mama so ugly, when she sweats, the sweat runs down the back of her head to avoid her face.
How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it!
You know you're ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera.