What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
You Jokes
Yo hairline so far, that if you put tables on it, it would NEVER end.
Why you should never borrow money from dwarves?
Because they are always short! šššš
What do you call seagulls that fly over the bay? Bagels.
Mother: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you follow?
Me: Leads a marching parade off the Golden Gate Bridge.
How do you kidnap Stephen Hawking?
Shut off his computer.
Where can you donate an aborted fetus?
Your local pizzeria.
Do you know Joe?
Joe who?
Joe *boom*.
I know this girl, Kamelah. She say, "What are you looking at?" I said, "Iām just tryna figure out why it look like Santa stole your hairline."
Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?
Orphan: I don't know what you mean.
Me: There is no one to give a present.
These two guys were texting each other.
Guy 1: How are you?
Guy 2: Iām great. The weather is lovely here. Guy 2: *sends picture of a flying spring*
Guy 1: ???
Guy 2: Springs in the air. :)
What dessert do you get on September 11th?
An ice cream flight!
If you drop soap on the floor, is the floor clean, or is the soap dirty?
Why is death taken so lightly?
Because you can take it so quickly.
My friend died. Me and my other bestie start singing the coffin song. My bestie in the coffin, why are you not sad? Why are you still alive?
If your dad didn't bring the milk, what are you dipping your cookies in?
Me: What do you call an orphan?
Friend: Homeless.
Are you the Twin Towers? Cause I'd love to take you out. š¤
What do you call a group of emo kids? Suicide squad.
Q: What do you call a person with Down's syndrome who smokes weed?
A: Baked potato.
