You jokes

Ligma

Me: It's so sad Ironman died of ligma. You: What the heck is an Ironman? Me: Ligma balls. "snap" ^kaboom^

Mama

Yo mama so ugly, when she sweats, the sweat runs down the back of her head to avoid her face.

Memes

Shooting

What am I gonna do on the 5th anniversary of the Parkland shooting?

Shoot a load in you just like I shot those kids ;)

Mirror

Bully: Who you looking at?

Me: A Build-A-Bear.

Bully: Where?

Me: Look in the mirror.

Hairline

Your hairline is so far back that if you wore yellow, people would think you were One Punch Man.

Yo mama

Yo mama was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale said: "OOOWWWWW!!!! Get off me, you overweight bucket of lard."

Chromosome

What do you call a notorious special needs student with an extra chromosome?

The double trouble.

School

I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.

Mama

Your mama is so stupid.

Your dad said, "You're driving me crazy," so your mom handed him the keys and said, "You can drive."

Rose

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I need your peach, and I'll torture you with a speech.

Mom

When you see your mom.

Me: bruh

Her: Are you serious right now bro?

Me: Yeah no shit.

Her: *slaps me*

Time

Well, you know what they say, time flies when you're just a ball of anxiety and stress. :D

Crash

Why do blind kids like plane crashes?

Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.