You jokes
You text someone to ask them why they snobbed you. Then they snob you again.
What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.
If you look for something for 10 days and a woman walks in, opens a cabinet, and finds it:
So, just hire a female pope for the Holy Grail that has been missing for 500 years so she just opens a cabinet and she finds it.
Did you hear the one about the Polish elevator operator? He was fired because he couldn't learn the route.
What's your mom and a dog got in common?
Both will lick dick if you put peanut butter on it.
Memes
If a black person calls you a cracker, let them say it. You can say things they can't say, like, "Thanks for the warning, officer!"
How do you play chess with a Catholic?
You put a condom on the bishop.
What do you call two guys fighting over a slut?
Tug of whore.
My sister's boyfriend was coming around for Christmas Day. He had the option of two birds to tuck into: Turkey or Goose.
I said, "Are you not satisfied with my sister, who is literally handing herself on a plate to you?!"
A man wakes up and asks his wife, “Are you okay? You were cursing me all night in your sleep.” The wife replies, “Who says I was sleeping?”
What do you call a flooded hospital?
Vegetable soup.
Q: How do you know you're at a gay barbecue? A: All the hot dogs taste like shit.
What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?
A LYRICAL ILLUSIONIST
What do you call a rapper who can't swim?
A FLOATER!
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to cook?
MC Skillet.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to cook?
Lil Sizzle.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES fishing?
MC Bass-Drop.
What do you call a rapper who's also a pirate?
Captain Rhyme.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to cook?
Chef Rhymes.
What do you call a rapper who's always late?
Time Rhyme.