You jokes
What do you call high Mexicans?
Baked beans ;)
My sister thinks she's so smart. She said, "Onions are the only food that makes you cry." So I threw a coconut at her.
What can you tell a dog, but not your girlfriend? Come.
What do you call a bad amputation?
A rip-off.
I'll never forget my mother's last words: "What are you doing with that sledgehammer?"
Guy: Say "I'm a man" every time I stop.
Person:
Guy: You walk into a bar.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: You meet a girl.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: You and the girl go to a hotel.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: You guys go on a bed.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: She whispers into your ear...
Person: I'm a man!
How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw spoons at her.
what do you call a drunken sailer?
arrested.
What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
You want to hear a 9/11 joke?
I bet they did too!
A boy breaks a vase, and his mom says it's ok, honey, mistakes happen. How do you think you were born?
What do you call a homeless orphan?
Homo-less.
When was the only time you could see people base jump without a parachute?
2001/9/11.
Mortar is like a woman's fanny; the more you play with it, the wetter it gets.
My tutor just said this quote of 2k18^^^
Pontypool is rough.
"Wanna hear a joke?"
"Sure."
"You SURE will be glad when this dad joke's over."
"That was pretty DAD!"
Did you hear about the two burglars that stole a calendar?
I hear they got six months each.
If you steal a lottery ticket, is it considered Grand Theft Lotto?
Sir, I mustache you a question...
Ah, never mind, I'll just shave it for later.
I was talking to my friends and they said a random topic about cats, and I'm like, "Water you talking about?" =3
What do you call a baby with red curry fried hair?
A baby using a potato peeler and a comb.