Person you don't know, my name.
Hookers are like drive-thrus; you tell them what you want, pay for your stuff, and leave.
Have you walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
Oh, neither did he.
What do you call someone that is Mexican that has a BMW?
A big Mexican woman.
I mean I'd tell you a joke about the pizza I ate, but it's just too cheesy.
What do you call a dead pine tree? A Nevergreen!
What kind of file do you need to turn a 15 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile.
Did you hear about the two-car pile-up in Mexico? Yeah like 200 Mexicans died.
A person asks a taxidermist what they do for a living. The taxidermist replies, "Oh, you know, stuff."
What do you call a three humped camel?
A prostitute from New York.
If you hate America, I don't like you :)
How do you make Indians explode? Press the red button.
What do you call a burning church?
Holy smokes.
What do you get when you cross a highway on a bike?
Run over.
What do you call a single bisexual?
All bi myself.
I saw your mother get into a white Ford Taurus on the corner of Milton and Halliburton, and you're still trying to tell me she ain't got no job cause she "can't get a ride to work?"
Q: You want to know why I don’t make jokes about 9/11?
A: They tend to crash and burn.
What do you call a girl skeleton dancing?
A bone-étit.
Why are the same Sally jokes told over and over again?
Because how can you tell jokes about someone who's dead?
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw the baby.
