Year jokes

I'm 17, right? Anyways, the other day my parents told me a joke they made 17 years ago, but they still haven't told the joke yet.

Your hairline is so messed up, I thought a 2-year-old cut you up!

Jo Mama is so fat, I left her printing last year, and she is still printing!

Why could not the 11 year old watch the pirate movie?

because it was rated RRRRGGGG.

I am guessing you don't understand :(

Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?

Friend: What?

Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.

My 3 year old sister kept saying, "I like your cut, G." Every time she does, I dodge and close my eyes, but she's the one who always ends up running.

Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.

A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old lady's house...

Old woman: Oh my! Goodness sakes, child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???

Child: Both.

My dad and I have been playing hide and seek.

It's been 15 years and I still haven't found him.

What does an 80-year-old woman taste like?

Depends.

I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.

The last entry was about 12 years old.

What are the three worst years of a black child's life?

First grade!

Been single for a couple of years and then I met this Muslim girl. She soon put the spark back into things.

It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.

You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?

When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...

...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?

One’s a Good Year, the other’s a great year.

What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?

He said he was awfully touched!

Play dead, they said.

Wasn't too hard.

I've been dead inside for years.

Canada being the most educated country in the world is bemusing, considering that Canadians cannot spell "legalise" and "programme" correctly.

Oh, and most of them do not realise that it's day-month-year, NOT month-day-year.

What's Michael Jackson's favorite toy?

Wet 6-year-old balls.

Did you hear the news? Michael Jackson died because he choked on 7-year-old nuts and balls.

10 years ago my dad said I should eat cereal with water until he comes back with the milk... I still eat cereal with water, sadly.