Wordplay jokes
There is a really, really small guy and his name is Adam, so I say, "Hey, look, it's an atom!"
I put the sexy in dyslexia.
Zelensky: I'm begging for Russian forces to withdraw from the whole of Ukraine.
Putin: Crimea river.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.
But then why was 10 scared? Because it was in between 9 and 11.
Bend over and spell run.
What's a pedophile's favorite type of garden?
A kindergarden.
Did you hear about the 100 centimeter girl?
I’d really like to meter.
To master puns, you got to relish them first. That's how I must(ar)d it. Who knows, maybe you will ketchup to my level.
What do you call a dog that tells time?
A watchdog.
I don't always roll a joint, but when I do, it's my ankle.
What did the mother say to Michael J. on the beach?
"Excuse me sir, but you're in my son!"
What do you call a cutta with ginger hair?
Flinn Taylor.
Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? Because she always ran away from the ball.
What do you call an idiotic cow?
A mis-steak!
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the end of paws; a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
What’s the difference between a thief and a pervert?
One will snatch your watch, the other will watch your snatch.
Knock, knock.
Who is there?
Bear.
Bear who?
Bear bum!
Me: Hey Joe, updog.
Joe: What?
Me: Updog.
Joe: What's updog?
*Facepalms*
Me: Lol in the corner.
Why were 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 9. Then why was 10 afraid? Because it was between 9/11.
What do you think was going through the heads of the 9/11 victims on floor 43? Floor 44 💀💀
What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth? A "glad-he-ate-her".