Wordplay jokes
What do you call a skeleton's omelet?
A bonelet.
There are some questionable candies out there, such as:
"All I want is a good Blow Pop."
"I don’t even want to know where that Butterfinger has been."
"If you do, you’ll probably end up with tasting the rainbow."
"Nobody wants to bite into an O’Henry."
"Or adopt Three Musketeers."
"Or even end up with a Sour Patch."
My friend told me to name a country in Africa.
So I said, "Hungry."
What starts with "s" and ends with "erm"? SuperM.
This means both "matrix" and "master" so take out the "u" and then you just get "master". When you think of sperm, you think of porn. If you're a master at something, you're also a star at it. So you get porn star.
What do you get when you combine a penis and a potato?
A dictator.
I put the fun in dysfunctional.
Two kids were sitting at a restaurant. One said, "Could I please have some water? I am feeling a little HORSE." The other said, "Animal Puns? TOUCAN play at that game."
What's a word that starts with "m" and ends in "airage" and all men like it?
Miscarriage. The joke never gets old just like the baby.
I have a lot of eggcellent egg puns, get the yolk... Oh come on, don't be hard-boiled!
What do cows use to do their homework? A cowculator.
I'm a proud racist. I love kart racing, street racing. Any kind will do.
What did the 9/11 survivor say when he went back to his family? "You won't believe it! The Twin Towers became conjoined twins when it happened!"
The "F" in "orphan" stands for family, but there is no "F" in "orphan."
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
'Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.
How do you think the unthinkable? An iceberg.
What are Michael Jackson’s favorite universities?
Brigham Young and Boise State.
What do you call an orphan that takes a selfie?
A family portrait.
What do you call a lesbian Dinosaur?
Lickalotapuss.
What do you call Yakub with no eyes?
No eyes Yakub.
Why did the 18-year-old girl need a ladder to go to school?
Because it was High School.