Wordplay jokes
"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Kid.""Kid who?""Kidnap you!"
What do you call a nazi that can’t see?
A nozi.
Say: "eye"
Spell: map
Then say: "enis."
What do you call a kid with an eyepatch and no arms or legs? Names.
Why can't you make fun of a bunny's head?
Because they have a hare-line.
Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like an apple.
Those were a-mug-zing jokes. They were Mugderful, and Mugjestic.
What do you call a coffee without water? Africano.
Why is 10 afraid?
Because it’s in the middle of 9/11.
What’s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can’t hear an enzyme.
Why is 10 always afraid?
Because it is between 9 and 11.
What do you call two natives in a sleeping bag?
Twix.
What would Hitler do if he was in Minecraft?
Mien.
What time did the man go to the dentist at? Two-thirty.
What do you call a skeleton's omelet?
A bonelet.
I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.
What do you call a drunk cat? A drunk cat.
There are some questionable candies out there, such as:
"All I want is a good Blow Pop."
"I don’t even want to know where that Butterfinger has been."
"If you do, you’ll probably end up with tasting the rainbow."
"Nobody wants to bite into an O’Henry."
"Or adopt Three Musketeers."
"Or even end up with a Sour Patch."
My friend told me to name a country in Africa.
So I said, "Hungry."
What starts with "s" and ends with "erm"? SuperM.
This means both "matrix" and "master" so take out the "u" and then you just get "master". When you think of sperm, you think of porn. If you're a master at something, you're also a star at it. So you get porn star.