Wordplay jokes
I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
God: Why is the teenager so short?
Angel: I don't know.
God: I said, "Strong as a bear!"
Angel: No, you said, "Ass hair."
God: No, I didn't!
What's a depressed person's favorite drink? A dipresso espresso.
What's the difference between dad jokes and bad jokes?
The letter b.
What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal?
LIFE.
Look under...
Under where?
You just said underwear!
HOLY CRAP!!!
Crap with holes in it.
Get it? HOLE - Y?
Why did the skeleton have no friends?
He was a boner!
Heheheh!
Ah, see ya soon kiddo.
I'm going on break.
I'll give you some fried snow later!
Two nuts were chasing each other. One said to the other, "I'm-a cashew!"
Say "lettuce" and spell "cup."
What do you get when you cross jokes and cum?
CUMedy.
What do you call a person with no body and no nose? "Nobody knows."
Why did the bee buzz off?
Because he had to bee somewhere.
I saw a dwarf scaling down a prison wall. I thought to myself, "That's a little condescending."
My boyfriend thinks he’s hilarious.
Him: How do you break things?
Me: You break things up.
Him: Okay.
Me: Is everything okay?
Him: We’re a twig. We’re breaking up.
Are you a rope? Because I wanna hang with you.
Who is the only person time waits for? Nun.
What do you call a eatable door?
- Coriander 😂
What does an Asian call a penis? A wong.
What does an Asian do with its legs? It wok.
Stop saying "cheetah cheater" jokes. They suck!