Wordplay jokes
One day I came to my mom and said, "MOM!!! I can make a butterfly!"
Mom: "No you can't..."
Me: *throws butter out the window* Me: "Look I made a butterfly!"
lol this isn't funny but I hope you liked it.
Herrit?
Laila has 69 boobs, but that is 222 too many. One day, she went on 51st Street to meet Dr. X, who ate all her boobs, and now she's boobless :)
6922251 x 8 = 55378008. Put the calculator upside down.
I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
God: Why is the teenager so short?
Angel: I don't know.
God: I said, "Strong as a bear!"
Angel: No, you said, "Ass hair."
God: No, I didn't!
What's a depressed person's favorite drink? A dipresso espresso.
What's the difference between dad jokes and bad jokes?
The letter b.
What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal?
LIFE.
Look under...
Under where?
You just said underwear!
HOLY CRAP!!!
Crap with holes in it.
Get it? HOLE - Y?
Why did the skeleton have no friends?
He was a boner!
Heheheh!
Ah, see ya soon kiddo.
I'm going on break.
I'll give you some fried snow later!
Two nuts were chasing each other. One said to the other, "I'm-a cashew!"
Say "lettuce" and spell "cup."
What do you get when you cross jokes and cum?
CUMedy.
What do you call a person with no body and no nose? "Nobody knows."
Why did the bee buzz off?
Because he had to bee somewhere.
I saw a dwarf scaling down a prison wall. I thought to myself, "That's a little condescending."
My boyfriend thinks he’s hilarious.
Him: How do you break things?
Me: You break things up.
Him: Okay.
Me: Is everything okay?
Him: We’re a twig. We’re breaking up.
Are you a rope? Because I wanna hang with you.
Who is the only person time waits for? Nun.