Woman jokes

What do noodles and women have in common? They both wiggle when you eat them.

I'm not saying I'm ugly...

But when I'm watching porn, the hot, sexy women in my area always pop up and ask me if I'm rich.

What do you call a woman covered in mud? A dirty dishwasher.

Why do Indian men marry fat women?

Because they worship cows.

Women are like rolls of toilet paper. They are either really cheap or expensive, you use them a lot, and they deal with a lot of sh*t.

Wanna hear a joke?

Woman's rights.

I like my women like I like my steak...

Bloody.

Man: Did you know pidgins die after having sex?

Woman: No, really?

Man: Well, the one I fucked did...

"I'd rather go through the pain of childbirth again than let you drill in my mouth," the woman told her dentist.

He replied, "Well, please make up your mind so I can adjust my chair."

What do you call the White House when a woman becomes President? A stable.

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing, you ain't already told her twice.

Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.

Jokes about menstruation are never funny, period!

What's the difference between a joke and two dicks?

Women can't take a joke!

What did the woman say when I told a rape joke?

"I don't get it."

What's the difference between a white woman and a tornado siren?

The tornado siren doesn't get raped.

Life is like a penis.

Women make it hard.

What is a failed abortion? Annabelle.

I got kicked out of a library for putting a book about women's rights in the fantasy section.

"Dad, what is 69?" asks son.

Dad: "Well son, it is a position where a man and women pleasure each other orally."

Son: "So what shall I write? Odd or even?"