I got kicked out of a library for putting a book about women's rights in the fantasy section.
Woman Jokes
"Dad, what is 69?" asks son.
Dad: "Well son, it is a position where a man and women pleasure each other orally."
Son: "So what shall I write? Odd or even?"
Life is a lot like a penis. It's relaxed, and just hanging there.
It's women that make it hard.
What's something similar between a clogged pipe and a pregnant woman?
You fix both with a coat hanger.
What do you call the woman that fucked sooooooo many hunks to have the condom break and a failure to be born? Ur Mum.
So, unfortunately, I got kicked out of the library again because, for some reason, they say that books on women's rights don't go in the fantasy section.
Why do women buy clothes from the kids section? Because rapists prey on the weak.
What is the difference between a flat tire bicycle and a woman?
Answer: You need to pump the tire on the bicycle before you ride it, while a woman you need to ride her and pump.
A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.
When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"
God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."
How are a woman and a car alike? Put something in them and they'll both start.
So, I was watching YouTube, and then my friend says, "Those videos never get old." I replied, "Just like a Make-A-Wish kid." After I said that, he shot me in the head and said, "And now neither do you." Now I’m in Heaven, and God says to me, "Welcome to Paradise where it is summer days, clear skies," and I said, "Are there summer women?" Now here I am in Hell with my buddy Hitler. I believe he’s a hero after he killed Hitler.
"Hippoty hoppity, women are property."
Why do women love wind chimes?
They vibrate.
If a woman says she needs to set boundaries between you and her, you would be crossing it if you are a Mexican.
What’s the difference between a WNBA player and a rotten apple? The apple has a chance to make it into the basket.
Why woman?
Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.
Women are like blackjack. I’m trying for 21, but I always hit on 9.
Wilt Chamberlain may have spread his seed among many women, but Kobe spread his brain matter all over California.
I used to be a man in a woman’s body. And then I was born.
