Wing jokes

I can cry, but I don't have eyes. I can fly, but I don't have wings. Who am I?

A cloud.

What has 4 wheels, no wings, and flies?

A dead cripple.

What's the difference between red wings and old cassette tape players?

One eats tape while the other eats pussy.

Two female mice met and one spoke:

"Yesterday I met a mouse. He was black, and he had wings, and he had some cool, sharp teeth. He said he only ate at night."

Other mouse: "Umm... that's a bat."

"That asshole! He told me that he is a pilot!"

Why are there not that many phones in China? Because there’s too much Wing and Wong, so they will "wing" the wrong number.

What has two wings and a halo?

A Chinese telephone. Wing-wing Halo?

Why doesn't Batman need Robin as a wingman?

Because he has no problem robbin' your girl.

What do you call an airplane that doesn’t fly?

A plane wingless.

Son: Yo dawg, tell me a story.

Dad: Y'all motherfuckers ain't gon' believe dis shit, so there was dis fairy aight, she had wings, so she flys into a KFC, and comes out with wings, chicken wings.

Also, why did Hawking try to walk across the road? His wheelchair only goes 1 mph, so he got hit by a bus.

What do you call a bird with no wings?

Answer: A FLAP.

"Ohh wing wing."

My pet parrot had an accident and lost both his wings... he is being very brave about it though... he is totally unflappable.

Why did the plane go to KFC?

To lose its wings and crash!

I was lying on the living room carpet the other day with my girlfriend on top of me in wings and a tutu, making out.

I called her the Fallen Angel.

Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!

An Asian man walks into a bar in Australia. The bartender says to him “why are you here? Get back in that wing wong country.”

The Asian man says “I’m here traveling and now I’m gonna attack you with my 40 gallons of fried rice I’ve had in my pocket since wa dinowar wages. #wingwong”

What do you call a squirrel with wings? A flying squirrel, it's pretty self-explanatory.

How do you know if a comedian is high?

Comedian: Why did the wings cross the road? To get to chicken.

While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, “No honey for you for one month!”

Later that afternoon, Johnny’s dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. “That’s it! No butter for you for one month!” says his dad.

Later that evening as Johnny’s mother cooks dinner, a cockroach runs across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, “Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?”

I guess this is pretty plane.

I am sorry I am just winging it.

Wow, I guess these jokes haven't taken off.

Wow, I just landed that one!