Whole

Whole jokes

Shrek

  • "Apple bottom cringe boots with the kek (with the kek) got the whole club looking at Shrek."

    Trauma

  • All I wanna do is *gunshots* *gunshots* *gunshots* and *click* *cash register noise*, unlearn years of trauma and maintain healthy habits and fulfilling relationships while learning how to have solid boundaries and a whole sense of self.

    CPR

  • I was at a restaurant and a waitress yelled, "Does anyone know CPR?" I said, "I know the whole alphabet." Everyone laughed and laughed, well, everyone except one.

  • 1
  • Food

  • Fatty told Skinny, "Do you have any food? My stomach is empty and I haven't eaten."

    Skinny replied to Fatty, "Well, doesn't seem like you need food, you ate the whole universe instead!"

  • 1
  • Sex

  • What’s the difference between oral sex and anal sex?

    Oral sex will make your whole day. Anal sex will make your hole weak.

  • 1
  • Life

  • Literally every movie:

    "I love you." "I love you, too."

    My life:

    My 'friends': "Hey, Hailey likes you!" Him: "Wtf, I have a girlfriend, sorry not sorry." His friends: Spreads the word throughout the whole goddamn country. 😶

  • 7
  • Funeral

  • My friend is upset with me because I sniffed his grandmother's nickers. Not sure if it was because she was still wearing them or if it was because the whole family was watching. Either way, the rest of her funeral was really awkward.

    Fat Man

  • Why are people in Japan always skinny?

    Because last time there was a "Fat Man", a whole city disappeared.

  • 6