New Whole Jokes - Page 5 - Worst Jokes Ever

Did you know Princess Diana was on the radio the night she died?

To be honest, she was on the whole dashboard too.

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What is the whole pile of poops mean?

Whole pile of shits

Why can’t orphans tell these jokes? Because there fun for the whole family to hear.

a souls fan raped me he said try finger but whole

its always fun to take anti-depressants, you either choose to take one, or the whole bottle.

Who need April 1st if your whole life is already a lie ༼⍨༽

What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.

Yo mama so fat that a whole forest grew on her but it was sad because she really smells so the forest died.

Your forehead is so big a whole jungle grew on it.

What do you call the whole population turning into emos?

The Great Depression.

its kinda sad seeing you attempt to put your whole vocabulary in one sentence oh wait you only said three words

if you hit a child that's child abuse. if you hit a family member that's abuse. if you kill either, it's murder for some reason. if it's a whole family, its genocide for another reason.

Dad: Ill pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie Next day: Dad: son what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen? Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life gosh dad your embarrassing. The dad sulked for 3 whole years Proof that words really can hurt

Three sons left home, went out into the world and each of them made a lot of money. During a reunion, they discussed the gifts they'd given to their elderly mum.

'I built a big house for our mum,' said the first.

'I sent her a Mercedes, with a chauffeur,' said the second.

And the third smiled and said, 'I think my gift was the best. You know how much mum enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know that her eyes aren't so good anymore? Well, I sent her a remarkable cockatoo that recites the entire Bible, both old and new testaments. It took a priest twelve years to teach him. That cockatoo is the only one in the world that can do it. All mum has to do is name the chapter and verse, and the cockatoo recites it.'

A few days later, mum sent out her thankyou letters. She wrote to the first son,

'The house you built is so enormous that I only live in one room. The trouble is, I have to clean the whole house.'

To the second son she said, 'I'm far too old to travel anymore. I stay at home most of the time, so I've hardly used the Mercedes. In any case, the driver is so rude.'

To the third son she wrote 'Dearest Freddie. You have the good sense to know what your mum likes. The chicken was delicious!'

A Pedophile pulls up to little Jonny, lowers his window and asks, “hey little boy, if I give you a Lolly will you come in my car?” Little Jonny, “give me the whole packet and I’ll come in your mouth”

the toothbrush Says'' i have the worst job in the whole world''. the toilet paper behind him''yeah right''.

Your forehead is so big we could fit the whole alphabet on there

The reason why God and Jesus have eternal life and the power, aka ( holy spirit) is to control us , take our free will, and our eternal life, which is our heaven. Our time! Just to show up, in the nick of time for the second coming in full costume ready to judge us. Them spending a lifetime preparing thier big speach, thier excuse of them hiding this whole time. Lol, Surprise! Joke being on them. As we all stand there and are there to judge them. Doing what they said they were made for. Taking our eternal life back from satan and the devil and sending them to thier home they created themselves! HELL! P.S. With a little extra punishments !