Wheres Jokes

A girl goes to a Church to confess.

Girl: "Forgive me father for I have sinned."

Priest: "What have you done my child?"

Girl: "I called a man a son of a bitch."

Priest: "Why did you call him a son of a bitch?"

Girl: "Because he touched my hand."

Priest: "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)

Girl: "Yes father."

Priest: "That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch."

Girl: "Then he touched my breast."

Priest: "Like this?" (as he touched her breast)

Girl: "Yes father."

Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

Girl: "Then he took off my clothes, father."

Priest: "Like this?" (as he takes off her clothes)

Girl: "Yes father."

Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

Girl: "Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where."

Priest: "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where)

Girl: "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!"

(after a few minutes)

Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

Girl: "But father, he had AIDS!"

Priest: "THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!"

Guy 1: Why is my cat so angry?

Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage.

Guy 1: Don't you?

Guy 2: Yeah, it seems delicious.

Guy 1: Mmm, so... w-wait what are you doing? I didn't think you meant the one in my lunch :< Where are you leaving #_#

**Meow...**

Guy 1: Shut up, I will never feed you this sausage. It's not for you :< -_- </3

I saw a kid crying and asked him where his parents were. He started crying harder. The ungrateful brat. I see why he is a orphan

April's fool day:go tell an orphan their parents are back Ophan: Where.................. Oh

Where did the king put his armies?

In his sleevies.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

"Where's my tractor!"

Where do golf players practice?

Near a gulf.

Orphan: My mommy and daddy love me.

Guy: Where are they then?

Orphan: In the eternal depths of [hell].

Where did Holly go during the bombing?

Everywhere.

Do you know when the thing of you when the was is where you and if you when you where if I and you where in the thing is where yes?

Where do you find an orphan? Just look for your mum.

I wrote a joke on MH370... but I don’t know where it went.

When you are sitting outside at school and this boy comes up to you with a rock in his hand and says, "Do you know where Mrs. Stewart is at?"

One day I asked my mom where kids came from. She said the man who went to the milk store.

Five years later, he came back and left again.

Husband: Hey, my dear, this lunch is great. Where did you find the recipe?

Wife: In a detective novel.

Where do squirrels go for fun?

The acorn-ival.

Where do nuts go for a quick energy boost? The nearest Shell station.

Orphans have it lucky. When teachers threaten to call parents, the orhphans say, "Try me". When teacher's give homework, Orphans say, "Where?"

hi this is Pete's pizzeria and abortion clinic,where yesterday loss is today's sauce

I know this isn't an orphan joke, but I didn't know where to say it, so yeah.

I threw a nut at the allergy table and screamed, "YES, TRIPLE KILL!"