When jokes

I thought it would be fun to become a shooter. It became less fun when I realized that "shooting a woman up" also included a condom.

What do you call an orphan when he's taking a photo?

Family photo.

I found a place before called an orphanage, but when I was allowed in there were lots of kids, and I said, "Where's your parents? Oh yeah, you're orphans." Gosh, that was one heck of a day!

So when Kim Kardashian went into the ocean, the lifeguard said, "No plastic littering!"

What did the orphan say when his mum asked, "What do you want for dinner?"

He replied, " "

What does Joyce from the show "Stranger Things" say when she has a flat tire? "Wheil, wheil, wheres wheil?"

A zebra couldn't find any grass. Then he saw a monkey cooking. He thought to steal a little, but he was burned in the fore, and the smoke was all over him. But when he went to the ocean, it was still there, and zebras are stuck in this style forever.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

"Where is my tractor?"

When a king farts, is it considered a noble gas?

When you are chilling in the World Trade Center, and then you suddenly get airplane WiFi.

What happens when the terminator pees?

Gasoline descent.

Therapist: And what is it about this generation that bothers you?

Satan: I give them the intro tour and they just say shit like "ooo spooky lol."

Therapist: That's not so bad.

Satan: When I showed one girl the pit of everlasting flame, she sighed and said "big mood."

I'm going to start taking confetti with me to therapy so when my therapist asks me, "How are you?" I can say "sad" and toss the confetti everywhere. It'll be like a real-life iMessage!

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

El, if I know.

Yo mama so fat that when she sits around the earth, she sits around the earth.

Yo mama so fat, when she had an interview for NASA, they said, "We don't hire planets."

What did Michael Scott say to someone when he passed a plate of vegetables?

Boom! Roasted!

When you don't wear earrings for a long time, the hole can close, and it hurts so much when you want to put it back. 🙄🙄 😁😁😁🤣

I started crying when Dad started cutting onions.

Onions was a good dog.

What does Hitler's partner say when he begins?

"Hindin!"