When jokes
Q: What is the difference between a pizza and a baby?
A: The pizza does not scream when you put it in the oven.
When you can’t have Chinese food because you don’t have any pets,
just eat African food, you have plenty of neighbors!
I hate it when people are at my house and ask, "Do you have a bathroom?" What answer are they expecting? "No, we pee in the yard?"
A whale went to the country Wales for vacation.
When it ended, what did he say? "I had a whale of a time!"
Q: What do you get when you drop all your potato chips in your couch somewhere?
A: A couch potato. HaHaHa
What happens when you bring a paedophile to a baby's birthday party?
You will have even more birthday parties to go to.
Why do you go to the bank?
To get money.
When do you run from the bank?
When the cops come.
When do you go at stop and stop when done?
I don't know, I'm not a pedophile.
When Chinese babies are born, they should put a sticker on their forehead saying "MADE FROM CHINA".
When Chinese babies are born, they should put "MADE FROM CHINA."
What did Adam say when he saw Eve?
Answer: "Woman!"
It was 7:00 a.m. when Billy ran downstairs after a long night of sleep. He got to the kitchen where his mother and father sat. "What would you like for breakfast?" Billy's mom asked politely. Billy replied with, "Whatever Dad gave you last night in your bedroom would be great! You seemed to like it very much!"
When pigs went to the desert, they turned into bacon.
What's the difference between an air blower and Little Boy?
When the air blower blew, it did not wipe out Hiroshima.
When your friend does a finger-gun and his dad appears behind him and does it too, with the real deal!
A guy is bankrupt, so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can. So the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says, "I'll f--ck you for $10." The boy says, "I would, but I don't have any money." She says, "Ok, I'll take the duck instead." He says, "Ok," so they go upstairs and f--ck. The prostitute says, "That's the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back, and we can do it again." So they do, and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs, the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home, his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says, "Well, I got a f--ck for a duck, a duck for a f--ck, and $25 for a f--cked up f--ck."
You’ll need a bib when you’re done eating my ribs.
My dad told me that his dreams were shattered a few years ago.
Then I asked him how many years ago.
He replied with, "When were you born?"
When is a door not a door?
When it’s ajar!
When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.