When jokes
When you're the only one nice to the quiet kid.
Kid: "I like you... don't go to school tomorrow."
How can you tell when your sister is on her period?
Your dad's knob tastes funny.
How do you know when you should tell a heterosexual woman to stop sucking your dick?
When there is blood coming out of your dick instead of sperm.
Why did the orphan kill himself when he found out who his dad was? Because he found out his dad was Donald Trump.
Roses are red, violets are blue, When I see you, I play with my poo.
When you're excited to finally see your sister, and then you realize she's wearing your clothes.
Your mama so fat that when she went to McDonald's, they said, "Sorry, you've had enough, ma'am."
I was walking down the street when I saw this dude just vibing. He was telling every guy that walked by if his dick was bigger than theirs, they have to give him 50 bucks.
Long story short, I walked away with 100 bucks that day.
When I say, "Daddy," my stepbrother raises his head.
Doc: Can I help you?
Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.
Doc: When did it begin?
Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).
Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...
Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.
Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?
Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.
What did the customer say when Beef a Roo made him a bacon cheeseburger?
Thank a Roo.
What did the mouse 🐭 say when his friend broke their teeth?
Hard cheese! 🧀😂
Why did the chicken cross the road?
He was just feeling like he needed a break, you know? Life is hard when you're a rooster looking after your hen and chicks. He just wanted a sense of normality, walking out of the farm. He felt light-headed, staring into the distance. Then, at this very moment, he realised it was his darkest hour.
Join us for more of the story, after the break!
When I try to call my friend, I can't get through because my name is Lin Kon, and the operator keeps saying, "Yes, Mr. President."
My mom said she wanted to be a comedian when she grows up. So after she was an adult, she had kids. When they were old enough, she told them you could be whatever you want...
What does a bird say when it gets sick?
I flu!
What is the difference between Princess Diana and my laptop?
When my laptop crashes, I give a s**t.
When a midget smokes weed, do they get high or medium?
Your momma is so fat, when she gets done having sex she rolls over and smokes a ham.
What did the cookie say when he jumped off the cliff? Crumbs, ha ha!