Whats jokes
What’s the difference between a nose and an orphan? A nose gets picked more.
My friend: "Yo, stupid."
Me: "Is that right? And what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?"
My friend: *rolls eyes* and says, "Whatever."
Me: "Keep on rolling them; you might find your brain in there."
What's the difference between humans and bullets?
Humans miss John Lennon.
What's the difference between an American 12-year-old and an African 12-year-old? About 40 pounds.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but what do two Wrights make?
The first airplane.
Memes
What has 4 wheels, 2 legs, and loves his shoulder?
Stephen Hawking.
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One smashes open when you hit it with a sledgehammer, and the other is a watermelon.
What do you call an Asian prostitute?
Suck Mi Dong.
What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?
The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.
What does a perverted frog say? Rub it.
Why don't witches wear underwear? To get a better grip on their broom.
What do girls and rocks have in common? The flat ones get skipped.
What is red and goes 200 mph? A baby in a blender.
What do you call disabled people that follow politics?
A special interest group.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on juan.
What do painters and prostitutes have in common?
They're both paid for a good finish.
What do you call two Mexicans fighting? Juan on Juan.
What do planets like to read? Comet books!
A 10-year-old: "I don't want to smile without having a reason to. People shouldn't think I'm happy 24/7."
A 10-year-old, a week later: "Damn... my life is shitty..."
<2 years later> 12-year-old: "What is de-pre-ssion?" *googles it*
Now 14-year-old: "Oh..."
What's worse than depression & suicide?
Easy: LIVING. Everyday you wish you were dead but then reality hits you in the face that you're still alive and have to suffer living.
Pretend or not pretend, we have to decide everyday even if we don't pretend no one will notice :) no one ever does :). Living is the problem to everything. We get depression cuz of it and so much. Why can't we just die :)?
What is a pedophile's favorite song?
Jerking off in A minor.
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A Doberman in a playground.
You know what me and my spine both have in common? We are both not straight.