Whats jokes
What's the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I was born pretty, what happened to you?
What do you call an Asian who can't hear?
Wha U Sai
What do Batman and a Black man have in common?
Answer: They can't go anywhere without Robin.
What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet... What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))
What's worse than ants in your pants?
Michael Jackson.
Q: What's yellow and floats?
A: A bus full of children.
What do you call a suicide bomber in a wheelchair?
An RCXD (remote control explosive).
Little Sally found out that she had hair on her private area and went up to her mom and asked, "Mom, I have hair on my privates, what is it?"
"Oh honey, that's your monkey," the mom says.
So little Sally runs up to her big sister and says, "My monkey has hair on it!" So the sister replies with a laugh, "You think that's cool? My monkey is already eating bananas!"
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "I gagged."
Jack and Molly are sitting in school one day. Molly is asleep when the teacher asks her a question, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?” Jack sees Molly is sleeping and quickly pokes her with a sharp pencil. “Jesus Christ almighty!” shouts Molly. “Correct,” says the teacher. The next day the teacher asks, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?” Molly is again asleep and is poked by Jack’s pencil. “Jesus Christ almighty!” she shouts. “Correct again,” says the teacher. The next day, for a 3rd time, Molly is asleep. This time the teacher asks her, “What did Eve say to Adam when she had so many children?” Jack pokes Molly with the pencil again, and this time Molly screams “If you stick that thing in me one more time I’m going to crack it in half!”
What did the suicidal leprechaun say?
"Irish I was dead."
What did Schrödinger say to Shakespeare?
"To be and not to be."
What is a Jamaican's idea of a balanced diet?
A joint in each hand.
What's a mentally retarded person's favorite color? Clear.
There are three people in a plane that is about to crash: Trump, Obama, and a nine-year-old girl, but only two parachutes. Obama says, "Oh my, I need one. I need to protect my family," so he jumps off! Trump says, "Oh, I am the smartest man in the world. I must take it," so he jumps off. The nine-year-old girl says, "Welp, I guess he took my school backpack" :) so she leaves the plane! What a good ending.
What did the plane say to the twin towers?
Wanna play Jenga?
"Say what you want about the deaf."
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, how did you know and what gave me away?
Me: Where's your parents?
Orphan: They died and I have a phone, why?
Me: Because it has a home button.
What do kidnappers and Mickey Mouse have in common? They say, "Come inside, it’s fun inside."