Whats jokes

What is wrong with the orphan website? It doesn't have a homepage.

What do lizards and Queen Elizabeth have in common?

They both live long with dry skin.

What did the priest say during the christening?

"So anyway, I started blasting!"

What do lesbians and turtles have in common?

They both eat plastic. (I'm sorry to the lesbians out there; this is a joke, not real.)

What TV series do orphans hate?

"House, M.D."

You know what I like most about people with Parkinson's... Their handshake!

What is an emo's favorite game? Hangman.

What do you call an orphan's family tree?

A stump.

My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.

What do dropouts and Boeing 767s have in common?

They crash and burn.

What's the difference between economy and Vietnamese?

Economy doesn't work.

What do guns and gum have in common?

When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.

What do you call a selfie that an orphan takes?

A family picture.

Q: What's 1+1? 2+2? 4+4? 8+8? Name a vegetable.

A: Carrot 🥕

What do you call a blind German? A not-see Nazi.

I saw an orphan on the road. I asked him if he's an orphan. The kid says, "Yeah, what gave it away?"

I say, "Your parents."

Sans: What do you have there?

Frisk: A KNIFE!

Sans: NOO!!!

Being asked for advice after a failed suicide attempt:

"What advice do you have for people out there?"

As a suicide professional, don't try this at home.

All these 9/11 jokes need to stop.

My uncle died in 9/11. At least he died doing what he loves: flying planes.

Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?

Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)

Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.

Me: *Confused*

Sister: They're both horrible.