Whats jokes
What’s the difference between an orphan and a tomato?
The tomato gets picked.
What’s the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!
What is the difference between a whore and an onion?
You don't cry when you chop a whore.
What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer?
You can’t pull on her hair when you’re raping her.
What happens when the orphan at school gets sent home?
What is a cow's favorite move? -- The sound of moooosic.
What's black, white, and "read" all over?
A zebra after a lion is full.
What do eggs use in war? Eggk47s get my yolk this is really cracking me up!
They’d probably get shellshocked, wasn’t it all eggcellent? Ok, Ok, I’m headed for the egg-it.
Why did the new egg fell so good? It just got laid.
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.
A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.
what is the fastest country? iran.
What did the watch say to the failing watch company?
"You better watch it!"
What do you call a white man having intercourse with a black woman?
An Oreo.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
......
Them: You want some Lucky Harms?
Me: What are Lucky Harms?
Them: They're Lucky Charms, but instead of being magically delicious, they're magically malicious.
Monkey: What ya doing?
Other monkey: Just you know, "hanging around."
Bad joke, right? I just can't think of something amazing. It's like my brain is "hanging."
What color is Sonic's ball?
Blue because he keeps getting rejected.
What's the difference between humans and bullets?
Humans miss John Lennon.
What do you call a person in America that is not a retard?
A foreign exchange student.
What do you call a dolphin in the woods? Dead.