What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?
A cat has nine lives, and a frog croaks every day.
Whats Jokes
"Hey, hey, Spongebob! Water you doing?" [laughs]
"Just looking for all my coins with my metal detector because beach better have my money!" [laughs]
"How much have you found so far?"
"Y'know what, I'm not really shore!" [laughs]
What goes hahaha bonk?
A man laughing his head off.
Bf: Hey, what ya doing?
Gf: Just lying in bed.
Bf: Just lying in bed?
Gf: And eating cereal.
Bf: Ha, nice, what would you do if I was in bed next to you...?
Gf: Eat my cereal.
Bf: I mean if the cereal wasn't there.
Gf: I'd get out of bed and get more cereal.
A kid had school today.
He was late every single day. He said in his mind, "I wish I can go to school again." What happened? It's obvious...... He died :)
What's the difference between a picture of Jesus and the real Jesus?
The picture only takes one nail to hang.
What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.
Dad: What time do you wanna go to the dentist?
Daughter: *tooth hurty*
Dad: All right.
Hey, Mom, I'm back from the circus parade. It was amazing! First came the elephants, then came the tigers in the cage, and then came a beautiful lady on a white stallion. Oh, and what came after her?
Asked the mother, "Dad and every sailor in the state of Tennessee," said the boy.
My son said that bully needs a pounding, then I say, "Yeah, right, that is what I said and did to your mother." My son opens his mouth and freezes. I guess he knew what I was talking about.
What do you get when you mix a lemon and a cat?
A sourpuss.
What do you call an orphan taking a picture?
A self-portrait.
What do a condom and a gun have in common? You should never use either one of them.
What happens to a baby when you let it run loose? It can't cause it can't run yet.
What happens to chickens that get kidnapped by rapists?
They get choked.
What’s the difference between a barcode and Rachel Sutherland’s wrist?
Nothing, they both get scanned for a fresh new pack of razor blades.
Me scrolling through jokes that sum up my life, starts crying.
My friend: What’s wrong?
Me: Nothing, it's just so funny. Lol😂🤣😂
Why do orphans play GTA?
Because they need to know what it’s like to be wanted.
What do me and a casino machine have in common? It takes about 50 pumps to get to the jackpot.
A couple and their friends were riding their tricycle, and one wheel fell off. They discussed what to do, and finally the friend said, "Why don't you just use me?" The boyfriend said, "Why did I not think of using the third wheel?"
