Whats jokes

What’s the difference between drugs and kids?

I don’t do drugs.

What do humans and monkeys have in common? They both hang from trees.

What type of cake can orphans not have?

Homemade.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs laying in a pile of leaves?

Russell

I work with animals!

What do you do?

I’m a butcher.

What did the man say to the woman? "Make me a sandwich."

What do you call a man with a curly toe?

Carlito.

What do you do when you hear your wife squirming around in the back yard?

Reload... chhchhhh.

What happens when a furry takes over Nazi Germany?

The Furred Reich.

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an emo bitch?

The Twin Towers hit the ground.

What does Jesus have in common with Pinocchio?

They believe their own lies.

What color is your Bugatti?

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and the people at the old folks home?

They both collapsed.

So little Susie came home and said, "Mom, little Johnny showed me his pecker."

And her mom said, "WHAT?!"

And little Susie was like, "Yeah, it reminded me of a peanut." Her mom said, "Oh, because it was so small?"

Susie said, "No, because it tasted salty."

What do you call a winter time contact?

A Santa Claus.

What did the Roman say to the gladiator?

See you later, gladiator.

What's the difference between an apple and emos?

They both hang on trees.

What was the last thing that went through the heads of the 9/11 jumpers?

Their ankles.

What's Jack's favorite flower? A rose.

What happens to Mary Poppins when the wind dies down?

*Mary Poppins seen falling in background*