Whats jokes

What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?

One's got hope in her soul, the other's got soap in her hole.

What do you call a train with bubble gum?

A chew chew train.

Oh man, I'm depressed.

What do you call depressed Sesame Street?

Emo's World.

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?

Lickalottapuss.

What’s the worst thing to do at a funeral?

The corpse.

What do you call a single bisexual?

All bi myself.

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because it was a very large mammal; its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to Heaven, I will ask Jonah."

The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to Hell?"

The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

I'll never forget my grandma's last words, "What are you doing in here with that hammer?"

What’s ten feet long and bald?

The conga line in the cancer ward.

What’s the best part about twenty-eight year olds?

There’s twenty of them.

What do you call 6 gay men going to war?

Rainbow 6 Siege.

What is the difference between a man performing anilingus on a woman and a man performing cunnilingus on a woman?

If a man is performing anilingus on a woman, it is not classified as heterosexual sodomy, you fucking idiot!!!!!

What's a Mexican's least favorite lesson in art? Drawing border lines.

A Muslim is about to commit suicide when a Catholic priest stops him.

"What are you doing?!" exclaims the priest.

"There is nothing on this Earth for me," the Muslim says. "I will commit suicide to go to paradise and get 72 virgins!"

The priest shakes his head.

"Foolish Muslim, suicide is not the way!" he says.

"Follow me, I'll take you to the local primary school."

What is italian sausage?

The dick of a gay italian.

What was Michael Jackson's favorite dessert? Cream pie.

What's a depressed person's favorite drink?

A depresso espresso.

JK.

It's cyanide.

Islamist guys and American Christian right-wing guys are both similar in that both abhor the existence of gay people, but only the Christian Right loves to eat sausages, especially the little ones, if you know what I mean...

What's the most expensive haircut in the world?

Chemotherapy.