What's the difference between drugs and kids?
I don't sell drugs.
So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world
Q: What was the orphans first phone? A: The iPhone X because it had no home button
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
De-calf-inated
What did the suicidal leperchaun say Irish i was dead
What does a spy do when he's cold? He goes under cover.
What’s a cannibals favourite takeaway shop
The orphanage
Kid: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Kid: But, mom, I'm blind!
Mom: Exactly.
What do you call you're daughter's boyfriend when he brings her back past 10pm?
An ambulance
What do you call a high school student? Alone and depressed.
whats the one thing me and the new years ball have in common
its not gonna be the only thing falling 50 stories this new years
What do you call an autistic kidwith a gun?
Special Forces.
What do you do with epileptic lettuce? -- You make a seizure salad.
friend: “ whats that on your arm” me: “ oh nothing just decided i wanted to cosplay a tiger “
What do you call a peanut on the allergy table?
A kill streak
What did one traffic light say to the other. Stop looking I am changing
My son asked me what dark humor was, so I told him, see that kid in the wheelchair, ask him to stand. He said, But Dad I'm blind. Exactly
What do you call a dwarf police officer?
A guinea pig
What kind of chocolate does lesbian hate? Ones that contain nuts.
what is the one thing cripples can't do......stand up comedy
