Whats jokes
What do you call a cute door?
Adoorable.
What is a glory hole at the adult book store used for?
Campaign contributions to the Republican Party.
What is Stephen Hawking's least favorite movie?
Standing Tall.
What's the difference between parents and depression? At least one of them leaves you.
What's the difference between a silver medal and a priest?
They both came in a little behind.
Memes
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? -- "Bison."
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just WAVED. Can you SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? Don't be a BEACH.
What's the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile?
One is Catholic.
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!
What's the best thing about 28 year olds?
- There's 20 of them.
What is Hitler's least favorite month?
Jewly.
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? -- A stick.
Friend: “What's that on your arm?”
Me: “Oh, nothing. Just decided I wanted to cosplay a tiger.”
What did the north tower say to the south tower?
"You're too young to smoke."
What do you call an athlete who injured 75% of his spine?
A quarterback.
What do TVs and girls have in common?
They both show you stuff when you turn them on!
What makes a joke a dad joke?
I don't know. I don't even have one as an example.
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A vanilla shake.
Kid: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Kid: But, mom, I'm blind!
Mom: Exactly.
What's great about an emo pizza?
It cuts itself. Yay!