Whats jokes
What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.
What do emo kids and bats have in common?
They both hang from trees.
What do you call an ex eating Taco Bell?
Explosion.
What do you call it when Hitler abuses his wife?
Adolf Hit Her.
What's the difference between what Bill Cosby did and what OJ Simpson did? OJ Simpson's victims actually suffered and I actually feel bad for them (the boyfriend at least).
Memes
What do Michael Jackson and Tesco carrier bags have in common? They’re both made out of plastic and harmful to children.
What do you call being run over by Michael Jackson?
Being hit by... Being struck by... A smooth criminal.
What is the difference between a boomerang and an orphan's dad?
The boomerang comes back.
What do you do when you see a kid alone? You beat them up and say, "It was self-defense!"
What's the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
What’s red and very rare?
A baby in a blender.
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that?
The baby at the bottom of the pile is still alive.
What's worse than that?
The baby at the bottom of pile is eating its way out.
What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is ten kids in one container; morbid humor is one kid in ten containers.
What's a paedophile's favorite footwear?
White Vans.
What did one fish say to the other?
Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.
What do you call a frozen communist?
Hammer and popsicle.
What do rats like on their birthday? Mice cream and cake.
What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?
I'm logging out.
what do you call a drunken sailer?
arrested.
A woman walks into a supermarket and sees a blind man swinging a dog around in the air. So, the woman walks up to him and asks, "What are you doing?" The man says, "Just having a look around."