Whats jokes
What do ghosts put on their bagels 🥯?
Scream Cheese 😱.
Me: What did one toilet say to the other?
You: What?
Me: You look flushed!
What’s a hairdresser’s favorite roast? Flat iron roast.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack, then sell it again.
What do an X-Box and Michael Jackson have in common? They're both made of plastic and little kids turn them on.
What do you call a white kid at the back of the class?
School shooter.
What is the difference between Betty White and Paul Walker?
Betty didn’t reach 100 before she died.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
What's Pee-Wee Herman's favorite Michael Jackson song?
Beat It.
What do you call a broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless!
What’s the most expensive haircut?
Chemotherapy.
What do you call a skunk falling from the sky?
A stink bomb!
What's the only thing Mexicans can unwrap on Christmas? Tamales.
What were Stephen's last words? “Battery low.”
What's blue and doesn't weigh much?
Light blue.
What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.
What do you call a cup with a handle?
A mug! HAHA ha... My parents just got a divorce :(
what did the woman do after meeting up with a rapist?
sue the dating site for matching her with him.
So, I was sitting with my little brother and talking about our dreams. "What do you wanna be when you grow up?" I asked him. He answered, "A doctor!" I wanted to tease him so I said, "I wouldn't be treated by a doctor like you." I was hoping he would get mad or something, but instead, he calmly replied, "Brother, I said doctor. Not a vet."
So, Little Johnny comes home from school knowing damn well he messed up his math test. His mother and father get home and he tells them, "Mom, I failed my math test." His mother aggressively says, "Get the belt!" Johnny says, "Why?" His mother says, "I'm gonna spank you for failing!" Johnny says, "So just like daddy?" His father turns red knowing what they did last night.