Dr. Brody: Sir, your son has a disease called boofa.
Dad: What's boofa?
Dr. Brody: Both of these nuts in your mouth.
Whats Jokes
A blonde, redhead, and brunette are all sitting in a hospital's waiting room for ultrasounds.
After a while, the brunette giggles while rubbing her belly. Both the blonde and redhead look over at her and ask, "What's with the giggling?"
The brunette replies, "I'm having a boy!"
The blonde and the redhead ask, "How do you know?"
"Because he was on top!" The brunette replies again.
The three go back to conversing, and then the redhead starts to giggle while rubbing her belly.
"What's with the giggling?" The blonde and brunette ask.
"I'm having a girl!" The redhead replies.
"Well, how do you know?" The blonde and brunette ask again.
"I was on top!"
All of a sudden, the blonde bursts into tears.
"Oh, honey! What's wrong?" The redhead and brunette ask.
"I'm having puppies!"
What do you call a cow with no legs? (Ground Beef!) No, a cow! The absence of legs does not change the fact that the species is still a cow!
What do you call a DOG with no legs? (A dog?) It doesn't matter what you call it, as it's never going to come.
What is a pedophile's favorite job?
The mall santa.
What did the turtle do when he ran out of gas?
He went to the Shell station.
What is the difference between Betty White and Paul Walker?
Betty didn’t reach 100 before she died.
What's the difference between a hooker and Jesus?
Their face when you nail them!
What do you call someone smart and dead?
Stephen Hawking...
What do you call a German man who can't see?
A not see.
One day, the fat kid came up to me and asked me, "What's cracking?" The floorboards, you idiot. You're causing a 9.7 Richter scale earthquake and asking ME what's cracking. It would be best if you looked down for a second.
What does a killer say in the shower in the morning?
- Splish splash, I'm gonna slash...
What's the only gun that doesn't exist in Africa?
A water gun.
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
The suicide squad.
What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.
What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.
What do you call a horse rider with Down syndrome?
Down Quijote.
What do you call a belt made of watches? A waste of time.
What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature? -- Tequila Mockingbird.
What do you call a fish with no eye?
A ffsshh.
What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.
