Whats jokes
What do you call a dog with no legs? Call him whatever you want, he's not coming.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair that you push in a fire? Hot Wheels.
What did the north tower say to the south tower during the summer? Get ready for fall!
If you were driving when all of a sudden a young kid and an old man run right in front of you, what do you hit?
The brakes, you sick bastard.
I replaced "Jingle Bells" with "Jiggle Balls"... "Jiggle balls, jiggle balls, jiggle all the way! Oh what fun it is to ride on jiggly balls today!"
Memes
W dog
Are you depressed? Go punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What is a prostitute's favorite form of traffic control?
Speed humps.
What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
What do parents tell little boys to make them behave?
"Be good, or when you're asleep, Michael Jackson will get you!"
I never do dark jokes, but when I feel like it, I prefer orphan jokes, 'cause they're the safest option. I mean, what are they gonna do, call their parents?
What do Kurt Cobain and an emo kid have in common?
They both smell like "Teen Spirit."
What did one orphan say to the other orphan?
"Robin! Jump in the Batmobile."
What did the toilet say to the other toilet? "You look a bit flushed."
What do you get when you cross Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
Predator 2.
What show does an orphan hate the most? Modern Family.
What is a briefcase?
A short lawsuit.
What game does a suicidal person who is very bad at word or guessing games love?
Hangman.
What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza?
Pizza won't cut itself.
Friend #1: "What's your favourite thing about trees?"
Friend #2: "Apples"
Me: "I can hang myself in them."
What is the difference between a baby and a canoe?
I would never put a canoe in my garage.