Whats jokes
What's the difference between an in-law and an outlaw?
An outlaw is wanted.
What's the smartest crime?
3rd degree murder.
What's the difference between apples and orphans? The apples get picked, XD!
If you want to SH but not in the sell farm way, come ooon.. do you even know what does that means?..
What does Michael Jackson ask little boys before going to bed? Are you sleeping?
What did the tree say to the wind?
Leaf me alone.
What do the initials NOW stand for?
(A.) National Organization For Women
(B.) National Organization of Whores
(C.) All the above
Answer:
Since the initials NOW can stand for anything, the correct answer is all the above.
Q: What is Trump?
A: An oversized oompa loompa.
I bought shoes from a drug dealer yesterday. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day.
What did the North tower say to the south tower? "Sorry, can't talk, got to catch a plane."
A cop saw an old lady carrying two sacks. He asked the lady what she was doing. She opened one bag and shows a bunch of cash.
"How did you get all this?" asked the cop.
"Well, I live behind a golf course, and my backyard has many holes in its fence. Since there are no bathrooms nearby, the golfers stick their dicks through the holes and piss onto my hard, and that keeps killing my flowers. So, I grabbed my hedge clippers, and when they stick it through, I grab their dick and yell, '10 bucks right now or it comes clean off!' After that, nobody pees in my yard ever again."
The cop responded with, "Dang. But what about the other bag?"
She said, "Not everybody paid."
What does a slave owner use to buy slaves? A Master Card.
What did Cinderella say when she sat on Pinocchio? "Lie to me."
What's red and spins really fast?
Kurt Cobain's ceiling fan.
What do you call four black people in a sleeping bag?
A Kit Kat.
What’s the best part about fucking suicide girls?
The pussies are limited edition.
What’s the difference between a thief and a pervert?
One will snatch your watch, the other will watch your snatch.
What’s the difference between a Hispanic and a stoner?
A stoner has papers.
What do you call a bee’s love?
Honey.
My dad told me to do what he did best, so I left.