Whats jokes
A man walks into a bar and says, "I'm feeling depressed. What do you have to cheer me up?"
The bartender replied: "A shotgun."
What's a ninja's favorite type of shoes?
Sneakers.
What do you call it when a man is scared in Panera Bread?
Panera dread.
Stop it! What if a blind person sa- oh wait, never mind, carry on.
What does my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
Memes
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple's actually get picked.
What do you call an apple that fell out of the tree?
An orphan.
What do you call a house with dog hair?
A shed.
Michael Jackson broke his window. What does he say? "I can't see."
What is the toughest thing about living a vegan life?
Getting up at 5am to milk the almonds.
What do old people and meth heads have in common? They usually trip over their balls.
What did the orphan say to the other orphan?
"Get into the Batmobile, Robin."
No one cares if you bully an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's the difference between an orphan and cotton?
One gets picked.
Q: What kind of club do roosters go to? A: The Chicken Strip.
I made that one up.
What is black and at the top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking after a house fire.
Why did orphans want to commit a crime?
Because they wanted to see what it feels like to be wanted.
What did the short Chinese man say when he was called a dwarf? "Da fok yu sai tu meee."
What do you say when you see your TV floating away at night?
"Drop it, Jamal!"
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, "This isn't working." I'm not sure what she's talking about. I opened the fridge door and it's working fine!