Whats jokes
What are three things you can't give a black guy?
A fat lip, a black eye, and a job.
What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.
Alzheimer's protesters march chanting. "What do we want? Better treatment... When do we want it? ...Want what?"
What did the processor say when it was being overclocked?
"Stop it! It hertz so much!"
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head 'n Shoulders.
What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?
Lim Ping.
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child?
The washing machine doesn't cry when you put a load in it.
If all your clothes were stolen, what would you go home in?
The dark.
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, "This isn't working." I'm not sure what she's talking about. I opened the fridge door and it's working fine!
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.
Doctor: I've got good news and bad news.
Patient: What's the good news?
Doctor: I've got you flowers.
Patient: Awww, What's the bad news?
Doctor: They're for your grave.
Two wind turbines were standing on a hill.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other one says, "I'm a big metal fan."
What do you call a selfie that is taken by an orphan?
Answer: A family photo.
What's a ninja's favorite type of shoes?
Sneakers.
What do you call a house with dog hair?
A shed.
What did the north tower say to the south tower during the summer? Get ready for fall!
If you were driving when all of a sudden a young kid and an old man run right in front of you, what do you hit?
The brakes, you sick bastard.
Why did orphans want to commit a crime?
Because they wanted to see what it feels like to be wanted.
No one cares if you bully an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's the difference between an orphan and cotton?
One gets picked.