Whats jokes
What is a orphan's favorite 🎥🍿?
Home Alone.
What starts with “M” and ends with “arriage”?
Miscarriage.
What do you call a whore with a runny nose?
...Full!
What's red and really bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do you call a cow that was hit by an anvil? A flat iron steak.
That one stupid kid in class :
Alzheimer's protesters march chanting. "What do we want? Better treatment... When do we want it? ...Want what?"
What does a house wear?
A dress.
What is the difference between Bin Laden and Santa? One stops at the top of the skyscraper.
What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?
Lim Ping.
What's the best thing about an abortion joke??
No one gets offended.
What do you get if you cross diarrhea with incest?
I don't know.
Neither do I, but it runs in the family.
Q: What do orphans call a family reunion?
A: Me time.
My wife and I watched The Perfect Murder together. Excellent movie, but what disturbed me though was my wife constantly taking notes.
What did the cop say after he shot the ginger?
"I guess orange is the new black."
A man walks into a rooftop bar and takes a seat next to another guy. “What are you drinking?” he asks the guy.
“Super Power Beer,” he says.
“Oh, yeah? I doubt it?”
Then he shows him: He swigs some beer, dives off the roof, and lands with no damage whatsoever. He walks back into the bar.
“Amazing!” the man says. “Let me have some!” The man grabs the beer. He drinks it, jumps off the roof — and falls 15 stories to the ground.
Splat.
The barman says. “You know, you’re a real idiot when you’re drunk, Superman.”
What's the one good thing about pedophiles? They slow down near schoolzones.
What do you call a vegetable who has escaped prison?
An escapea.
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg?
Eileen.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food? Microchips.
What's the hardest part of riding a scooter?
Telling your parents you are gay.