Whats jokes
I parked in a disabled space today...
...and a traffic warden shouted to me, “Oi, what's your disability?” I said “Tourettes! Now fuck off!”
what's another name for cumming inside of a woman?
loading the dishwasher.
What are a group of depressed people called?
A suicide squad.
Q: What do you call a pervert with no legs?
A: A creepy crawly.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite instrument? Little skin flutes.
My girlfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. What a stupid thing to Fallout 4.
What do you call an Australian visiting the UK on holiday?
Returning to the scene of the crime.
Why can’t orphans learn about ancient Egypt?
Because they wouldn’t know what a mummy is.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a guitar teacher? One likes to stroke his finger across A minor, and the other one plays guitar.
What do you call a suicide bomber under the water?
Answer: A bath bomb.
What do you call a flat-chested emo? A cutting board.
what do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
a family photo.
What's white, sticky, and better to spit out then to swallow?
Toothpaste.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite drink?
Milk, because his parents never came back with it.
John Lennon: "What a nice view."
John walked outside.
He got shot.
:skull:
So, my friend and I were talking this time. I asked them what they would do if they ever met Rengoku. They said that they would probably like shake his hand or something, but I said I would lick his forehead. Wtf?
What kind of music do wind turbines like?
They are big, heavy metal fans!
What do you get when King Kong steps on Batman and Robin?
Flatman and Ribbon.
What kind of exercise do lazy people do?
Diddly-squats.
Do you know what you first feel when you shoot someone?
The recoil.