Whats jokes

Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Alright, you motherfuckers get off here, and you motherfuckers get off here." His mom comes rushing in and says, "Little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!"

After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Okay, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in the kitchen."

What do city plumbers and pedophiles have in common?

They both lay pipes in public parks.

What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common? They both let little kids sit on their lap.

What do you call an Indian electrician?

Ashok 😂

What's the difference between a pizza delivery guy and a cop?

Pizza guys get punished for not doing their jobs properly.

So a guy named Nathaniel just came home, and when he enters his sister’s room, he sees her f***ing a piece of broccoli. And Nathaniel says, “Abbie, what’s wrong with you? I was going to eat that later, and now it smells like broccoli!”

Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Sarah waves her hand, "Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!" Miss Rogers says, "All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?" Sarah says, "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, Sarah, that's a mouthful." Sarah says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."

What do you call a bear with extreme mood swings? -- A bi-polar-bear.

What did the fish say before he hit the wall? -- "Oh, dam."

What did one orphan say to the other? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

Jared from Subway. Remember kids, "tuna sub" backwards is what I'm going to do on your face.

A guy walks into a bar. He sees a hot girl. He walks up to her and says, "You're getting laid tonight." She replies, "What are you, some sort of psychic?" He says, "No, I'm just stronger than you."

What do you call an autistic kid with a glock?

Special forces.

Btw, I'm 13.

What food does a cheetah eat?

Fast food.

What do you call a retard in a house fire?

Flame Retardant.

What do you call a movie with kids with cancer? ... Finding Chemo.

Son: Mom, what is dark humor?

Mom: Son, do you see that man trying to tie his shoe with no hands?

Son: Mother, you know I'm blind and can't see!!

Mom: Exactly!

What does an evil hen lay?

Deviled eggs! 😈🥚

What would Batman do if he wasn't rich?

He would be robin.

What did the blind man fight in the bar?

The coat rack.