Weather jokes
You know, it was so cold in D.C. the other day, I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
What did the British soldiers say while in the trenches? "Damn, it's windy out here!"
Do you want to hear a cold joke?
Can't. It warmed up.
These two guys were texting each other.
Guy 1: How are you?
Guy 2: I’m great. The weather is lovely here. Guy 2: *sends picture of a flying spring*
Guy 1: ???
Guy 2: Springs in the air. :)
You are like a thunderstorm; when you go away, like your dad, everyone is happy.
(On their 1-2 loss to Watford) Ty: Well, we mustn't forget that it's been raining so...
Robbie: It's been raining???
Ty: Yeah!
Robbie: Are you being serious??? It's raining for both teams!
Red hot 🥵
It's ice to see you.
What's the difference between fathers and hurricanes?
Nothing. They both destroy families and then leave for a couple of years.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this one's gonna blow!
A vagina is like the weather. Once it’s wet, it’s time to go inside.
Harder than a diamond in an ice storm.
It's a Italy day outside the fields.
Yo mama so stupid, when they said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a bowl!
When can an elephant use an umbrella and not get wet?
When it's not raining.
You used to be someone’s sunshine, but sorry, the climate changed. 😂😂😂😂
What do you call 3 orphan girls in a tornado?
All of her twist.
What do you call an Eskimo stripper?
A frosty-tute.
How does a rapper stay warm in the winter?
With some HOT TRACKS!
Why doesn't bread like warm weather?
It gets toasty!