War jokes
What's the difference between WW2 kamikaze planes and 9/11?
One of the missions succeeded.
My granddad killed Hitler.
There is a feminist group in my town.
It is called Gal-Qaeda.
(I actually got this from The Simpsons, so credit to the show.)
Where did Janet go during the bombing? Everywhere.
What do you call a retreat in war?
A backup plan.
Me: I bombed the 2 tests yesterday.
Friend: What were the tests about?
Me: Japan.
Where did Lucy go after the bombing?
Everywhere.
Why’s it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl? You gotta drop the bomb twice.
When and where was the biggest BBQ ever?
Hiroshima, Japan 1946.
What's the worst part about breaking up with a Japanese girl?
You gotta drop the bomb twice before she gets it.
John and Chloe are in school arguing about who has the more heroic grandfather.
Chloe says, "My grandfather killed 50 Nazis, he's so heroic!"
John says, "So what? My grandfather KILLED Hitler!"
Why does Hitler hate golf?
He would end up in a bunker!
If Germany is the father land, and Russia is the mother land, would WWII just be domestic violence?
Why were glow-in-the-dark condoms made?
To play Star Wars.
Roses are red, violets are blue, the last time people got depressed ended World War II.
What should you never say to a Japanese person? "You're da bomb!"
Where did little Lucy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
My cousin asked me, "What do you think was going through Hitler's mind right before he died?"
I told him, "Probably a bullet."
My grandpa is a great hero. He's the one who shot Hitler.
what do you call a rape victim in Ukraine?
Debris.