War jokes
I'm going to pull out your lungs faster than Joe Biden pulled troops out of Afghanistan.
Germany: As long as America stays out of the war, we should win.
Japan: *bombing Pearl Harbor* Cowabunga It Is!!
What did a gay Indian use as weapons of war?
A rain-bow.
My grandfather lost his tongue during WW2.
He never talks about it.
My grandpa's last words before he died in Vietnam were, "What the fuck did I step on?"
Where did the children go after he stepped on the land mine?
There, there, over there, and over here too.
What’s Hitler’s favorite letter?
Not Z.
When you think about it, Hitler wasn’t a bad person. He killed Hitler.
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese girlfriend?
You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets it.
Arabs: WHO PUT THAT TOWER THERE... we must destroy it!
Free blacks in the Civil War is the same as me drawing a reverse card in Uno.
Who is white, hairy, and rusty in the tree?
It's Rambo Rabbit with a big gun that was.
Why is America bad at Clash of Clans?
Because they already lost two towers.
"Ukraine be like Escape to Witch Mountain!"
What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?
— Don't ask me. How should I know? I'm just the drone pilot.
How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?
QUEUE THE MUSIC
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT
If you call the number 800-273-8500 in Afghanistan, they say, "Can you fly a plane?"
My grandfather killed Hitler.
Get it? Get it?
So, some ants in a colony go to war. They want some more troops and know that there are ants that went to wars as well. They call them war-ants.
They start barging into homes to search for more war-ants. They barge into a home, and the lady-ant goes, "Hey, why are you here? Can you please leave?" One of the ants replies with, "I'm sorry, but unless you have a war-ant, we have to keep searching your house."