War jokes
In America, you fight Ukraine.
In Soviet Russia, you fight Mykraine.
What's the difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt?
One actually finished a race.
I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.
Whoever killed Adolf Hitler is MY hero!
what song did people in Hiroshima listen to?
"Here Comes the Sun."
God: Who ever kills Hitler will go to heaven.
Hitler: 👌👌👌👌
God: 😩😩😩😩
Why did the Star Wars movies come out 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3?
Yoda was in charge of scheduling.
Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.
What's the worst thing to happen to a Japanese person in WW2... being drafted as a kamikaze pilot, or existing with a Fat Man or Little Boy?
We should give whoever killed Hitler a statue. Oh wait, never mind.
A guy tried to suffocate himself with his BMW exhaust, but his engine failed.
This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.
Q: How tall was Hitler's grass? A: *Hitler salute* about this high!
Why was Hitler broke?
The gas prices are outrageous.
I actually want peace, not war.
That's what I always try reminding my girlfriend before beating her up.
Ukrainians leave without saying goodbye.
Russians say goodbye without leaving.
When you have a hand clock it goes tic-tac.
When an American has it go backwards, it's tactic.
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hitler blew an 11 country lead, During World War 2.
America: "WE NEED MORE AMMO!"
Japan: "We are the ammo."
Two guys watching a war movie at a bar are talking. One says to the other, "The Nazis starved my dad to death in a concentration camp during the war."
The other says, "My dad died in a camp as well... he broke his neck."
First guy says, "How did he break his neck?"
Second guy says, "He fell out of the guard tower."