War jokes
What's the difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt?
One actually finished a race.
In America, you fight Ukraine.
In Soviet Russia, you fight Mykraine.
Whoever killed Adolf Hitler is MY hero!
I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.
what song did people in Hiroshima listen to?
"Here Comes the Sun."
God: Who ever kills Hitler will go to heaven.
Hitler: 👌👌👌👌
God: 😩😩😩😩
Why did the Star Wars movies come out 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3?
Yoda was in charge of scheduling.
Ukrainians leave without saying goodbye.
Russians say goodbye without leaving.
I actually want peace, not war.
That's what I always try reminding my girlfriend before beating her up.
When you have a hand clock it goes tic-tac.
When an American has it go backwards, it's tactic.
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Yo mama so fat that the US (Mexico) and North Korea (South Korea) got into a war fighting over who gets to use her as their border wall.
Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.
Q: How tall was Hitler's grass? A: *Hitler salute* about this high!
What's the worst thing to happen to a Japanese person in WW2... being drafted as a kamikaze pilot, or existing with a Fat Man or Little Boy?
A guy tried to suffocate himself with his BMW exhaust, but his engine failed.
This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.
We should give whoever killed Hitler a statue. Oh wait, never mind.
Why was Hitler broke?
The gas prices are outrageous.
America: "WE NEED MORE AMMO!"
Japan: "We are the ammo."
Little Herobrine, I'm cumming in ur mom! Call me Saddam Hussein cuz I'm dropping rap bombs!!