Want jokes

Why do orphans play GTA? Cause they wanna feel wanted.

Seriously, who wants fucking Annoying Orange as president?

A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, “This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for £300 as long as you can say it in three words.” The guy replies, “Hey, why not?” He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays £300 on the bar, and says slowly, “Paint...my....house.”

One day Timmy walks in on his mum in the bath. Then he asks, “What’s that dark fuzzy thing, mummy?” and mum said, “It’s a bush, every girl has one!” Then the next day he walks in on his dad in the shower. So he asks, “Daddy, what’s that long thing?” The dad then says, “It’s a sexy boy” accidentally. Timmy asks his dad, “What does sexy mean?” And the dad says, “Your mother, of course,” making it seem like a child-friendly compliment. Then the next day at school Timmy wanted to compliment his teacher. He walks up to her and says, “You’re so so sexy!”

What do squirrels and men have in common?

They always want a nut.

Why did a minister who is a Christian nationalist and a bisexual man give anonymous blowjobs to physically handicapped gay men under the handicapped stalls inside the men's restrooms at a rest area?

He wanted to eat footlong hotdogs for lunch at the rest area, but he wanted a sample first (taster).

Why did the woman throw her bills out the window? She wanted to send them via airmail.

Want to know how to fit 71 people in a car? Two in the front while we handle 69 in the back.

Q: Do you know why orphans rob banks?

A: Because it's a guarantee they'll be wanted afterwards.

Other girls want a guy who is 6ft, but does me being 6ft under count?

I was reading the news and read that a kid killed his family, and when they interviewed him, he said he wanted to become Batman.

Are you bleach? Because I want you inside of me.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Call him whatever you want, he's not coming.

I wanted to make a joke about homework, but sadly, I'm an orphan.

A depressed kid wanted to give me a high five.

I just left him hanging.

I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly, Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dove to save it. He said he always dives for pens.

Official Dj Penaldo playlist.

1. "I'm a fraud" 2. "I need you (ft. Tap-ins)" 3. "I Want to Leave Mid United" 4. "Back where I belong (ft. Europa league)" 5. "TY Eder" 6. "Nobody wants me (Rejectnaldo Remix)" 7. "Fuck that kid (ft. Lil Broke phone)" 8. "Sewy (Benched +arms crossed version)"

Why do orphans suck at GTA? Because they don't know how to be wanted.

What's worse than ants in your pants?

Your uncle.

Girl, are you a rope? Because I want to hang with you.